Thursday, March 18, 2010

Quality time..

Quality one on one time seems to be my biggest struggle since our family grew to a family of 5. But it's something I'm really working hard on lately. This past week especially, I've been thinking more about our family and my relationship with each member in it and I learned that each one of those relationships can use a little help.
I find that Ally being that she's almost 14 is hard to connect with the most on a daily basis. We butt heads and don't always enjoy each other's company. But I know that she's been feeling left out now that we have 2 small ones in the house so I've been making extra effort even when some days I just don't want to! Quality time with her is all about doing things away from the little ones, letting her have all the attention for a little bit. That doesn't happen every day but we go to the library, sneak out for an ice cream cone and every night we'll talk about her day while doing the dishes.
With Parker most of my one on one time with him is when he's nursing or if he wakes up in the middle of the night and we'll cuddle together until he falls back asleep. I look forward to when Dave's home on the weekends so that I can lay down with him for a nap just the two of us. We snuggle in tight, arms wrapped around each other and he'll grab onto a lock of my hair to twirl as he drifts off to sleep.
Sophie... again one on one time comes when she's nursing or when Parker's asleep and I sing to her or bathe her.
Staying connected with my husband hasn't been easy either. Since Sophie's been born we pushed each other's needs to the side and forgot about us as a couple which I know isn't uncommon but it's scary how quickly a happy marriage can sour if neglected. Having three children (and all who are at such tough ages: teenager, toddler, newborn) has been hard on us and we were getting resentful of each other as well as felt rejected by the other so this past week we've been working more on us: going to bed together, sitting near each other on the sofa and actually talking to each other.
It's not easy and we're just a family of 5. Makes me wonder how large families do it and make it look so easy at the same time!

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